women in ghana- part 2

This week I have had some very interesting conversations with some of my friends about women so I thought I would continue the theme of last week.
I am only going to state what I observe, hear, and see so if you would like to discuss anything more, please email me.
These conversations began by me first asking what are some of the issues in Tutukpene. Apparently, some of the major issues are "women chasing men." One of my friends was joking, but also serious, about how his wife would not give him water to bath after farm because she did not want any women to come and "steal" him. But then everyday, she dresses very well and looks nice. I spoke with another couple and the same sentiment was shared about the threat of another woman coming to steal her husband. Nothing was mentioned about the role that the husband played in reciprocating the "stealing."
I discussed this issue at length with the couple. The woman stated that if another woman tried to steal her husaband, she would murder the woman. I do not actually believe that she would murder another woman, but the seriousness of her statement about her options describes her powerlessness and the extent of her poverty regarding her ability to provide for herself and her children without a man. She described that murdering the other woman would be her only option if she wanted her children to survive. This topic of "murder" then led us to discuss another topic that numerous people have spoken to me about. This is the belief that women are evil and "Satan" because that is how it is "written in the Bible." The woman explained to me that there are many evil women, who are Satan, because they use witchcraft to get married, steal husbands, and murder other women's husbands (aka hit women). Her husband then told me that plently of women murder other women of whom they are jealous. I was quite confused because I had not heard anything of this phenomenon and Ghanaians are generally peaceful and happy. He then clarified and stated that perhaps it is just some. His wife stated that it is quite easy to murder a husband or the other woman and it could be done in a minute with poison or by leading the husband down to the riverside to help her "carry" something. Though murder may be easy, I have not heard of any of these cases of women committing acts of violence like this. I asked if something like this has happened in T.P. and they told me that the stories were coming from other places in Ghana, meaning that they could be overstated or just rumors.
Some of these ideas may be shocking, such as the blatant belief that women are Satan. Many people in America still hold this belief, though it may be evident only through their actions or affiliations. I was discussing with one of my friends how it is not a woman's fault if she gets raped. It is his belief (or was) that it is a woman's fault since women are temptresses (Satan) and that men cannot control themselves sexually so women must control themselves for the sake of the men. We are still fighting this perception and the detrimental affects it has on the victims of rape and sexual assault in America.
These conversations are difficult to have. Depending on the person and my relationship with the person, I may just listen for the most part. I generally respond with my own perception that it is not necessarily women who are evil. I explain that I think both men and women can do good and bad. I then explain that I think we all have the ability to do good more often than bad.
I am asking alot of questions, learning about issues in T.P., learning about farming (their livelihood), cooking, making groundnut cake (peanut brittle), riding my bike, and trying to shade myself from the African sun. I really like the people here and am beginning to feel more and more like a member of the community. I am looking forward to this weekend. There is a huge funeral so it will be a crazy dance party for sure. whoop. whoop.

tata
Lindsey